Commercials You're Currently Hating: Reborn

Protein. Proteiny proteiny protein.

The one about opioid induced ........ CONSTIPATION. They say it like there's been some big taboo about using the word.

I really want them to use Elvis for the opioid induced constipation commercial. It could be amazing.

Safelite repair, Safelite replace. Just maddening.

PCMatic. NO WAY this cheesy product protects computers the way they say it does. And their chief spokesperson dresses like a bum runs all his words together and exudes absolutely NO credibility. Neither does the legion of 'tech' people whose faces pop up to chime in on what a great, powerful, protective product it is. The inventor guy looks like he sat in his garage and strung together something made out of aluminum foil and a used JiffyPop and packaged it up as some kind of cyber security. It's maddening. The commercial, production-wise, is on a par with Popeil's Pocket Fisherman. Cheap.

Again, Panera with that medicated-sounding millennial crooning on and on about good, clean FOOOOOO-OOOOOOOD as it should be. Just please fall off a cliff, honey.

The anti-tobacco ad, with the retarded kids who can't tell the difference between tobacco products and candy.

"Do we get to keeeep anyyyyy?"

The sun will come out....tomorrow

The Discover customers talking to themselves as attendants. They think they re so clever.

All those old couples fighting over who's got the cheapest cell phone plan.

Republican celebrities trying to convince us that reverse mortgage is not a rip-off that puts capital and property back in the hands of the powerful.

Anything with Alex Trebek, Henry Winkler, Fred Thompson, Tom Selleck, or Blythe Danner

In general, all the fucking patent prescription drugs that Big Pharma pitches incessantly to Baby Boomers.

"Ask you doctor if Dixxaflopin® may be right for you!"

I HATE THE BASTARDS, all of 'em!

Wayfair with people dancing around their furniture.

I just took a shit and thought of your face while I wiped my asshole.

"Now we have furniture AND friends."

Dude, if I use your app to sell my shit, I don't want to make friends with the people who buy it.

I'm with R13. That is pure shit all around, the jingle has found itself stuck in my head on many occasions (much to my fury), the moms are intermittently lip-syncing along to said jingle (some do, some don't), the kids alternate between exchanging glances and thinking mom is nuts, to dancing around their living rooms with glee and excitement...it is just shit. Inconsistent, intelligence-bashing SHIT. And way too earnest--no way was this thought up as some send-up of an 80s advert.

I will also add that commercial for I don't know what that has two ladies in the driver's and passenger's seat dressed in green, I think, pretending to "rap." When it comes on I have to leave the room so I cannot recall what it's even trying to fucking promote.

That fucking Jimmy Fallon Tight Pants thing.

I want to destroy my television every time it comes on.

The washing machine ad with the father running with the toddler to the bathroom muttering 'don't poop, don't poop, don't poop' - it's completely vile.

I nominate all Geico commercials.

Future ones also.

The ones with the box you mail your shit in to a lab for colon cancer screening. Making it square doesn't confuse anyone, and I feel sorry for the UPS man, who undoubtedly knows what's in the box.

All the fucking commercials that force you to pay attention by inserting a doorbell sound into them.

That Johnsonville commercial with the talking animals. Is that guy autistic?

I LIKE the talking animals!

I have actually stopped watching most TV because of the commercials. The ones that put me over the top are the drug commercials usually for those drugs that they charge thousands a year for prescription.

all we get are prescription drug commercials....constantly.....

And why do they charge thousands a year for pills that cost 5 cents to make each? Because of "research" (whatever) ... and the advertisement budget!!!

Progressive needs to stick a grenade up Flo's snatch & be done with her.

The walking, talking intestine of Viberzi, a prescription irritable bowel drug. Red haired woman in a flesh colored bodysuit (intestines) hounding another woman, following her around and contorting herself.

Even if you fast forward, you can't avoid being assaulted by it. The ads gimmick is it's visual impact.

I miss the Colon Lady. Phillips finally realized what a disaster that ad campaign was and changed her to the Phillips Lady. LOL. God how does some of this stuff even pass muster?

From what I gather, AMERICA IS HAVING A GREAT INTESTINAL DISORDER CRISIS!!! People either can't poop, poop too much, need special wipes after they poop, or need talking cartoon bears to teach us how to wipe.

You hate them, yet you talk of them. Mission completed.

The Snyder's Pretzels, Baby! bitch

I'm concerned with the general trend in commercials portraying men as wishy-washy, indecisive, stupid and unable to stand up to the whims of their wives/significant others. I'm assuming these ads are being targeted to women.

R28, that woman in the body suit is one of the single most annoying looking and sounding women to appear on TV ...ever?

The newest Toyota ad with Jan the Toyota lady and this stupid annoying couple who are too dumb to speak. The woman has to mime steering and the loser guy has to clasp his hands like a 2-year-old to signify keys. Bitch, if you're too fucking stupid to pronounce the word key, you shouldn't be driving.

Oh my God, the adults eating Gummi Bears and lip syncing to the voices of little kids (badly). I want to vomit every time it is on and I don't know why. Maybe because it screams "Frau" (the ad agency variety Frau, anyway).

That sick Audrey Hepburn chocolate commercial.

The Cottonelle commercial where the British chick asks someone if they'd go commando. The one below is the worst. What I really want is for that fat guy to say, "There's only one way to tell if I'm clean." Then have him drop his pants and say, "Now tongue my shitter and tell me how clean I am!"

The gay dad shaving his leg with his teen daughter. Stupid.

The Oxyclean mom whose pig daughter had a barn wedding and gets her gown covered in mud. Dumb retarded bitch.

I *HATE* those Cottonelle commercials too, but the daddy in this one... WOOF!

The Sprint "can you hear me now?" guy who switched carriers or whatever. I can't stand his eyebrows.

This fucking guy who poses as a financial advisor (for some reason) and turns out to be a DJ. Cannot stand the face he makes when he does his stupid arm dance.

"Because I'm a woman..." deodorant ad. Pandering and stupid

Can someone explain to me what the wife's issue is with the husband cleaning a fish on her kitchen counter? A WOOD counter, no less, so he's not leaving marks with a knife. Isn't that what the counter is for? Instead, she sighs and looks perturbed and they are selling us Lysol to clean up the "mess", whatever it is. (The fish is even intact at that point).

There's also a dental commercial, maybe more local, with an actor with blinding white teeth -- and it seems he's been directed to talk with them exposed. So his big tongue lies there, trying not to get chomped on. He sounds lispy too as a result. Anyone else seen this? Cute Noah Wylie type guy but weird effect and probably not his fault.

The Haribo gummy commercial with the boardroom of adults speaking like babies.

The Spectrum Cable tv commercials which seem a rip off of Reagan's Morning In America campaign bits. Yes, it's wonderful that the sun comes up every morning and that we can pay $200 a month for shitty cable.

I fucking HATE that new iPhone commercial with the kids slapping cartoon stickers on everyone and everything.

Seriously? That's what they're selling? A toy for teenagers to send stickers to each others?

It's so fucking stupid it makes me never want to have an iPhone.

(I mean, that and the lack of a headphone jack... and the insufferable smug of Apple cultists)

The one with the anthropomorphized women's razor. It has boobs for some reason.

Do you have IBS with DIARRHEA?

The Metro phone company ads where various actors look into camera and smirk and shrug. Oh god, I can't explain why but it's cringe inducing. I have to stop whatever I am doing to watch too whenever it is on. Especially Soccer Dad and his little shrug.

I positively loathe all the fucking medicine commercials.

It petrifies me to get older and start getting sick. Jesus Christ!!!

Spectrum seems to have a spot, or multiple spots, within every ad break across every network. If only they put as much effort into their actual products instead of raving on about being the fastest growing cable company, as if that's meaningful information.

I was in an annoying pharma commercial last year, but I did love the money!

I'd do one a week if I could!

The Cheezit Grooves ad with the talking wheel of cheese. And another vote for the Viberzi ads.

All of the "real people, not actors" in the Chevrolet focus group commercials should be shot, including the insufferable host.

Cars for kids

They'll even take those pesky real estate donations off your hands that no one else wants

Tide gets out protein, by which they mean blood and cum.

Those helpful ads from honda

That nissan commercial where that stupid girl on the big wheel think its ok to spill paint on the drive way. With yhat attitude

Any prescription pharmaceutical ad. They need to be banned from TV.

All those catheter and colostomy bag commercials.

R54, were you by any chance the extremely hot husband (0:24) in this psoriasis commercial?

Why are people still watching TV commercials?

OMG the Taltz father with the hairy great legs and chest. Yes!!!

R68, do you mean the one in the green polo sitting on the dock with the woman?

R20. Can you just imagine being the one who opens all those boxes? People are so stupid. I'll bet you dimes to dollars, dumbells think they need to shit in the box rather than provide a "sample".

Also, the fat guy guy in pink who dances in the Wayfair commercial. Needs to go on that 600# show. What a nelly mess.

JD Wentworth 🎵🎵 877- Cash fuck you

It actually came on again as I was typing this.

Constant You're Gonna Die rehab clinic commercials, but those will probably die off themselves after the Republican Congress kills off Obamacare by defunding somehow.

Also that one talking about Stinky Number Two in the bathroom. WTF? ?

Jennifer Anniston's Eyelove commercial: OMG! Even her closest friends didn't know she suffered from dry eyes.

Tresiba Ready! Ugh. Fat people moving in slow motion with dumbass expressions on their faces as the Tresiba Ready banner flashes... Most annoying commercial ever.

They play the same ad for the Subway Italian Hero sandwich every 30 minutes on Spotify and Pandora. A bunch of Italian stereotypes having a mutual orgasm over a fucking sandwich!

"It's got spicy capicola, mortadella, oil & vinegar..."

"Oh my God- Sal, come look at Frankie's sandwich!!!"

Oddly enough, the TV version of this spot is much more toned down.

'Seconds and Surplus' television ads with the dumb-ass who brays, 'Yeeeeeeeeeee-HAWWWWWWWW!' at the end. Apropos (sp) of nothing. If you live in North Texas, you'll want to take that pistol that y'all have stashed in the couch cushions and shoot the TV when that twat lets loose! Christ on a BIKE!

The Little Caesar's commercial where the big black guy goes "smokeified".

Entresto: The one with the old people singing Tomorrow. It is just so damn depressing and sad. Makes you dread getting old.

Oh yeah, R78! That fucking "Tomorrow" song. Never realized how depressing and banal it is until it was used there.

r79, i know... I reminds me of my dad who died of heart failure last year.

I hate the Honda commercial where the dude in the white lab coat says the Honda Civic is "STYLISH". Sooo irritating.

I hate all of the Febreze commercials where they emphasize the word "stink" and things that "stink".

Febreeze sometimes smells worse on top of it. I wish they had a more neutral one. Those smells can give me headaches sometimes.

To show you the power of FlexTape, "I sawed this boat in half!" 😑😑😑 Please let me watch DS9 in peace you annoying Billy Mays wannabe.

R84 That one's really annoying, too. It's funny how the "jumbo" roll is 4 in by 5 ft! Only $19.99! I wonder what the regular size roll is: band-aid size?

R85, but call now we'll double the offer! 2 rolls for only $19.99. Just pay separate processing and handling. 😑 This damn commercial and now Cialis are on heavy rotation throughout digital sub channels How exactly do folks fuck from separate bathtubs again??

That financial advisor who looks like the Creature from the Black Lagoon who starts out his commercial by saying, "I'd die and go to hell before selling a customer an annuity!" Calm down, dude!

I like any pharmaceutical commercial that lists death as a potential side effect.

r71, My partner heard the Wentworth "I have an annuity" as "I have a NUTTY and I need cash now!" I get it stuck in my damn head, incorrectly, of course.

I actually do have an annuity from my mother, but I know better than to cash it out.

stink stoppers stops kids foot funk. NASTY.

I always have to provide my own narration for the Cialis commercials. "Let us fuck here in the park." ""Would you prefer that we fuck in the pool, or would you prefer to fuck out of the pool." "Let us fuck here in front of the open windows with the billowing curtains so the neighbors can watch us fuck." "Come into my house so that we may fuck."

The current Dish Network campaign with that "Most Interesting Man In the World" wannabe spokesman. That one with the fat frau waiting for the cable guy is absolutely grating. Then you get Spectrum's (formerly Time-Warner) "Dish-bad, Spectrum good" campaign going. You know, you all suck so stop trying make the others look so bad.

And don't get me started on Optimum's ads.

It may be a local(ized) thing but it's impossible to miss in daytime TV: the ad for Harrah's Casino somewhere in a Carolina that features the hetero couple from Hell (he's a lug, she's a twit though the actress s at least attractive, even without makeup) having a boring "date night" with another boring couple -- and then imagining what it will be like at Harrah's the next week. "Action!" "Relaxing!" "Steak!" And then the goonie blockhead male gets caught up in his fantasy and is throwing popcorn all over the room as everyone watches in faux dismay.

But the best part is when he looks at his girl and smiles/smirks and there is the grossest strand of pure saliva connecting a top tooth to a bottom tooth. They couldn't reshoot it to get a spit free take?

The mesothelioma commercials alone don't bother me... but the fact there are 100 of them on constant repeat with every law firm on the planet is crazy. And, I have a DVR! I still manage to see them. I think it may have slowed down though. It's been a little while since the last one I saw.

Anyone seen the one for Squatty Potty with the unicorn shitting what looks like rainbow colored soft serve ice cream? I thought VI Poo was unbelievable but this beats it by a mile.

I think the root cause of the "incomplete evacuation" is the chair height toilets that are in newer homes. If you're short, your feet can barely stay flat on the ground so you're leaning forward which hinders the poop flow according to the animation in the commercial.

Honda helpfulness commercials. Who gives a fuck. Sell cars!

The guy who's constipated saying "my doctor asked me 'why have you been holding it in?'"

Haha, R97. That's the one with the rugged constipated silver fox, right? I love him. Opioid induced constipation? Movantix moment?

Those annoying Wayfair "Drop the mic" commercials with all the idiot people dancing.

it was so much better when Law commercials and pharmaceutical commercials were banned. we didn't know how good we had it until it was gone.

The smug couple drinking the juice from their fruit bowls. The Wayfair commercials are so annoying. I'm amazed they haven't compelled millions to boycott the company.

R100, when were they banned? I remember when pharma commercials started airing, but wasn't aware that they had a history before that. I remember law commercials going back to the mid-80s, I think.

The stupid girl in the Talz commercial who gives a daisy to a guy in the park and then covers her face in embarrassment.

r102 Law commercials weren't allowed until 1977 and pharmaceutical commercials were banned until 1997. The US & New Zealand are the only countries in the world that allow pharmaceutical advertising on television.

The fucking hateful "If I only had a brain" commercial from shithole "University" of Phoenix disappeared for awhile, but it's baaaaaaacccckkkkk.

The one for Match where the guy in the park asks an Australian girl if she knows anyone that has used Match, and she replies, "Yeah, my SIS-tah" -- so annoying and I find myself saying it for no reason, "Yeah, my SIS-tah"!

The Dominos commercial that rips off Ferris Bueller. Make it stop!!!

Any commercial for Febreze or its ilk in which the actors or announcer refer to the product as "fresh." Those nasticals are anything but fresh.

Better than in the 40s when they pronounced it "pro-TEE-en

i just smelled a big fart.

For the last decade or so, every commercial for a vehicle (of any type) has been highly annoying, but the Lincoln commercials with Matthew McConaughey have opened up whole new realms of creepiness. The merest glimpse of his arrogant mug makes me think that, if ever a face begged to be bashed in with a baseball bat, that's it.

The YouTube clip has a mix of three of the commercials (though, actually, one was more than enough).

Panera Bread hired a new voiceover talent. No more annoying baby-voice.

that PSA where the dad and daughter play "my little teapot". The dad looks like an ex-con, child molester. Hate it.

I think it's for a telecom - the bearded hipster and his "son", the dog named Rambrandt or whatever.

Why isn't Matthew Mc making movies anymore? Has there been one since his Oscar? Instead he does these creepy commercials. I don't get it.

I love that commercial, R115. There was a commercial for an equally hipstery cat food last night right before the "my son" dog food commercial. The one-two punch made me want to go out and adopt a cat or a dog.

R114 for is either a stupid fat frau or skinny elderqueen, and watches "Law & Order: SVU" way too much.

r115 So much hate for "Topher and Rosenberg" ugh, this dude reeks of douchiness and all he does is dress his dog in matching overalls and shit and wears perfect sweatbands ala Luke Wilson in the royal Tenenbaums.

I wish they'd chosen a cuter boy and dog, R119, but it doesn't bother me as much as a lot of commercials.

The Cottonelle one where the little girl with a bad speech impediment says her poop hole feels like a "shimmawing muhmaid" ... these toilet paper commercials are getting creepy.

I am fucking sick of Flo and the Trivago guy. They were cute at first. Now, it is lame overkill.

Agreed about Trivago. Enough, already. That guy might still be appealing if he weren't short and straight.

[quote]Panera Bread hired a new voiceover talent. No more annoying baby-voice

I haven't seen it yet, I guess. I did notice a brand new Panera commercial earlier this week, and it's actually using the same girl with the universally despised voice, Zoe Wiesner.

Maybe they don't want you driving around on three wheels. Smart.

The chubby guy who is on some medication for his diabetes and now he can't stop dancing. Even sitting at his cubicle at work, mowing his lawn and chopping vegetables for dinner.

Oh yes, R124, our hatred of that commercial goes back quite a way's.

That, and her smug white guy counterpart: "Nooo, I picked the wrong insurance *company*."

[quote]The Cottonelle one where the little girl with a bad speech impediment says her poop hole feels like a "shimmawing muhmaid" ... these toilet paper commercials are getting creepy.

R121 - OMG! I've been meaning to post about that commercial and saw it right before I got onto DL. One of the other brats describes using Cottonelle as feeling like a "twinkling iceberg" pr something. WTF?!?

The Chevy commercial using a totally real and not a paid actor, who describes one of their fug cars as a "bad mamma jama." NO ONE TALKS LIKE THAT

The VW commercial with the couple fucking in the a car. I turn the station every time I hear that "Birds and Bees" song.

This one where the dad and son graduate college at the same time seems chronologically incorrect.

The young lovebirds are dressed like it's 1982 when the son is conceived, but then it fast forwards to the son being 18ish-- except in the commercial he's 18ish in the 2010s, not the year 2000 (using a smartphone like we all use today, not a '99 Nokia).

I don't hate it, but it bugs me, and every time I see it I remind myself that I need to bitch about it in a DL hated commercial thread.

Wow, FUCK that commercial, R130!

It's like, didn't they learn after the first kid? Stop having kids, you dumb cunts!

The guy was kinda hot though, in his wire rimmed glasses—a lifelong commitment to style.

R128, I hate that commercial too -- because of the peals of (female) laughter after he says "Bad mama jamma", as if it was some witty comment. Absolute Vomit.

R131 seems to have missed the point.

R130, the younger Adam Bailey appears to be 22, i.e., he's graduating college, not high school. I didn't see what grounded it in 1982 for you, though I didn't notice a computer. 22 years ago was 1995. Was there a computer in the commercial? I didn't notice.

Panera has NOT hired a new voice-over. Same annoying, uber-precious, STOOPID voice mewling on about 'clean foooo-oooood as it should be.' BARF.

I can confirm that Panera still employs Babydoll to coo about "good clean salad" that should have so many colors and textures.

Her name is Zoe Wiesner, R136.

"Why is my penis curved?"

Zillow has an ad that uses a dead mother and a little boy to sell houses. The dad and sad boy look at houses on the computer, later boy looks at a star out of the window and says that the brightest one is "Mom".

Next scene is the father tucking the boy into the bed of their new home; the boy looks out of a skylight, sees the same bright star and says "goodnight mom". Was that necessary?

My latest peeve has a loud, obnoxious guy holding up the line at the pharmacy because "This isn't VIAGRA-brand VIAGRA. I really don't want generic VIAGRA. I prefer VIAGRA-brand VIAGRA. It has to be VIAGRA-brand VIAGRA." Then he turns to the people behind him and says, "Sorry to inconvenience you, but I want to make sure I have real VIAGRA-brand VIAGRA."

I always want the woman behind him to be equally loud (perhaps doing an impressions of Madeline Kahn doing Marlene Dietrich) and say, "Tehk yeuh time, Misteh FLAWPEE!" But she never does, so I do it myself.

He needs to ask his doctor about new "Dixafloppin" from AstraZeneca.

R134, I am not following your questions about a computer. I didn't mention one in my post.

As I said, when the commercial begins, they're "dressed like" it's 1982. That's clearly the intentional-- their clothes and hair are like what you'd see on The Americans. Let's say the early 80s.

As the kid ages in the commercial, it shows him on a smartphone, where he's around 18. The commercial further progresses to show the kid, a few years later, graduating with his dad. My point was that someone born in the early 80s wouldn't have a smartphone -- not saying a regular old cellphone, but a smartphone back then.

The "host" of the Chevrolet "real people" commercials is named Potsch Boyd. I already despised him based on his thin beard & smarmy voice -- now there's another reason.

Sparkling Ice beverage with the family hanging upside down at their dinner table, trying to eat and drink while everything falls to the floor/ceiling. The kids are so snotty and just make me angry.

Have you been hurt? Call the hurt-line.

What does "Potsch" mean in whatever language that name is from?

[quote]The Chevy commercial using a totally real and not a paid actor, who describes one of their fug cars as a "bad mamma jama." NO ONE TALKS LIKE THAT

Those are not actors, you idiot. Those are focus groups. I've been to a bunch of them and people do talk like that.

Those focus group Chevy commercials annoy the shit out of me. Who cares what a bunch of morons think? (Just kidding, I know why focus groups need to include a lot of morons; they're just annoying in their insipidity.

I think Potsch is hot, though. I hated him based on his smug appearance at first, but then I looked him up on social media and he seems like a good guy.

R142 is correct about the smartphone incongruity.

Those Snyder pretzels commercials with the bewigged woman who says, "PRETZELS, baby!".

Is she undergoing chemo?

I don't know the name of the product, but one with the actress wanting to use some kind of air freshener after she goes to the bathroom because it stinks so bad .. it is most disgusting thing I have ever seen

Well smell Miss R147! She's an EXPERT at focus groups, and apparently quite cranky about it.

The car insurance ad where the gay-adjacent "teen" (looks almost 30) is going on about his "MINOR" accident in the most annoying tone, then cunty mama cuts him off and says '4 weeks without the car!"

The one with the guy whose favorite room is the guest bathroom in the basement so he can poop secretly. Then he takes a big wiff of the room sniffing in all the poop aroma.

The antiperspirant commercial with the ugly, hook-nosed chick in a pink blouse, airing out her armpits in her car while waiting for an online date to meet her. She's talking to herself as if talking with him, and then starts a spastic, sputtering rap with his name. Apparently she's not certain of his name and alternates between Brendan and Brandon. All the while, she's got her arms out so her sleeves catch the air from the car's AC. The guy--far too cute for her--approaches the car, and catches witch-face in Miss rant. She, mildly embarrassed, says "Brandon?" He corrects her. "Brendan." Then says he'll see her in the restaurant. Some VO about deodorant follows.

The girl is so ugly, and so stupid and pathetic. It makes my blood curdle.

Seriously, when did it become required viewing for us to participate in everyone's bodily functions in every ad? Disgusting.

R28 the gut woman reminds me of Kathy Griffin.

Special K's new "Own It" campaign; yet another series of ads to give the little mug-cradling ladies out there a self-esteem boost and remind them of how "amazing" they are. How are they so amazing? Because they eat, of course!

Get ready to heave...clip shows one frau whipping off her sweaty bra, and another breastfeeding in public, because DEAL WITH IT, HATERS!

Ugh, I can't stand the high school girls's version of "Satellite repair, safelite replace!" Annoying.

I could happily never see the woman talking about Keister town and hemmeroid cream again. "A marching band!"

For some reason, I ABSOLUTELY LOATHE the energy one that uses a folksy, Deliverance-y guitar version of the nursery song, The Farmer in the Dell. I don't know why, but in terms of sheer irritation, it's the aural equivalent of the name "Behati Prinsloo."

I hope that poor drug addled constipated broadway singer was finally able to poop.

"How much for this laptop?"

"You don't want to know."

Glares at each other in disbelief.

Bad acting all around. I can't believe DealDash didn't refilm it or get better actors. They thought this was a good final product.

Oh my GOD! R160!! Yes, that fucking FARMER IN THE DELL on the slide guitar! I haaaaaaaate that fucking commercial. It's like they're trying to make that melody sound "bad-ass", they add a blues note where there isn't normally one (right at the "hi-ho, the dairy-o" part), and that drum beat can suck my moist socks.

Horrible commercial. I'd like to take that guitar and bash it over the head of whoever came up with that song arrangement for the commercial.

^-R163- I LOVE YOU! I am laughing so hard, and it's only 3 a.m. May I please borrow 'can suck my moist socks' line?

There's a Terminix commercial that shows some termites flying out of a tree that makes me want to throw up every time I see it.

I thought I was the only one who hated tha Farmer In the Dell slide guitar monstrosity that R163/160 mentions. Can't hit mute fast enough on that.

Volkswagen has an ad which shows a widow traveling across the country by car to spread her dead husbands ashes into the ocean. The ad is sad/sweet but also a downer.

I'm sure this one has been mentioned as it has been on about a bazillion times: the kindergarten teacher who uses Booking.com for her Mexican vacation, while the kids tear up the classroom.

Although I do like the little tousled hair girl who spells out "BUTT" in pushpins on the bulletin board.

And the hideous car pool driving dad who yells, "This is my JAM!" and then sings two lines from Taylor Dayne's "Tell It to My Heart."

I wish he would CHOKE on that Cheeto!

The faucet commercial where the woman enters a diner late at night in a curly dark wig (presumably wanted by the cops), goes into the bathroom, removes wig to reveal straight blond hair....and then proceeds to cut her hair into the shortest pixie cut ever before stealing the faucet and walking out of the diner past the police detectives. The haircut is completely superfluous considering she came in wearing a wig.

Came across a jarring Liquid Plumbr ad showing multiple butt cracks. The tagline is that something like "now anyone can be a plumber", then they show various people doing everyday things with their ass cracks visible at the top of their pants. This is their cute/edgy way to tie in to the infamous 'plumbers crack' that is the basis of many jokes.

My friends know everything about me. They can tell what I'm thinking, just by looking in my eyes! What they didn't know is that I have dry, itchy, eyes! Can you imagine? They had no idea! Dry eyes! I was using eye drops almost every day, and my stupid friends had no clue! I don't know why I try so hard with these people.

R171 I needed to show my eyes some love.... some eye love.

I like that Booking.com commercial with the unruly kids and I love when the teacher snatches the iphone out of that little girl's hand as she says 'hello' and the little 'BUTT' girl's expression. I know they show the commercial too often, but I don't really mind it.

The commercial for transvaginal mesh/sling complications lawsuits. It's really unsettling hearing the words "TRANSVAGINAL MESH" repeatedly booming from your tv speakers.

I also can't stand every Viagra commercial featuring some slutty over-40 woman pitching the product directly to the camera. It's embarrassing to watch.

Hotels.com "Captain Obvious" commercials

r168 Preach! I fucking hate the music of Taylor Dayne so much that I almost hate her even though she is bffs with Leah Remini. That dad is foul too.

Why aren't more ad people killed? Are there any ad people on DL? They should be attacked.

r176 I had a friend in the 90's who used to do commercial jingles. She did that annoying "bye bye dry, I'm giving Tone a try!" and "feeling like cinnamon toast, feeling like cinnamon toast crunch!" She said they were purposely extremely annoying to stick out and be remembered.

The part I hate the most about that Booking.com teacher/kids commercial are the two boys who are apparently majorly retarded, since one is in a fishtank, and the other one is climbing into it.

All I can think about is the poor fish! Who cares if those two brats drown I just hope their imbecilic actions don't put the fishes lives in danger.

I'm grossed out by Booking.com's "Booking dot yeeahhh" tag line. The "yeah" sounds salacious and inappropriate. Like someone is getting a rubdown and the masseur hits an erogenous spot.

I don't know, maybe I'm just old fashioned.

r174 believes women are sluts for wanting sex with their man. Got it, 'open for business at any time' gay man.

r155 I swear the Brendan guy that comes up to the car at the end is gay porn star Marcus Ruhl. It looks just like him.

I may have posted this before, because I hate the song in this commercial series, but LOOK AT THE BULGE on this granddad. It's when the boy comes into the living room, and granddad goes to sit down on the couch.

Pops is PACKIN'.

R183 I guess he's just happy to see his grandkid.

Maybe you're just old, r180.

Didn't Chelsea Handler used to do whole hour long shows about knowing what was going on with Jen by looking into her eyes?

"Did you know Mom, Dad, did you know?

This deplorable ad. The song is particularly vile.

The man in a towel in the locker room saying "See me"

TV advertising is so hideously irritating that it's hard to come up even one commercial I actually like. The only one I have seen in ages that even comes close is the Apple ad for the i phone 7, set to "I Will Follow Him", with that single red floating balloon that turns into hundreds floating over Chicago.

The only recent TV ad I actually kind of liked was the Geico one with the Pillsbury Doughboy going through security at the airport. Otherwise, I can't even tolerate live TV anymore because the commercials drive me insane.

I actually just saw a funny one with a black guy driving with his family and they are all ignoring him and playing with their phones/listening to headsets and he goes on about his safe driver rewards and how he was able to buy some new golf clubs and that he also leaves the toilet seat up on purpose. I thought it was cute because it annoys the fuck out of me when I see families who are all just checking their phones.

Yeah and that actor is good. That commercial alone could lead to some big gigs just as "Sheldon" got his "Big Bang" series after that simple gum commercial (he was a true original in it, as well).

I think it was Trident. "Long lasting" gum. He was hilarious in it and the show came right after.

My friends know exactly what I'm thinking, just by looking in my eyes. What they didn't know, was that I had dry, itchy eyes! Imagine that! I fooled them! I used eye drops from the moment I got up! Stop reading my thoughts, you jerks! You don't know me! Stop looking in my eyes!

Please don't talk about commercials you like

OP r197, I'm sorry, I just had to have a break from such utter shit. Won't happen again.

I'm tired of all the Anthony Bourdain show promos on CNN, especially sick of hearing Blitzkrieg Bop and Bourdain getting bleeped every commercial break. Such an iconoclast! There's another commercial that uses the same song, too... A Peloton ad? Edgy.

This one's been taking vocal lessons from the Panera VO lady... lisp and vocal fry combo. A shest of drawers? It's not like IKEA didn't have the budget for another take...

Ewww, this milk has gone sour.

Why don't you use WalletHub? Your credit score can change every 10 minutes. The data is fresher than that milk.

Such bad acting all around! Why did they hire that guy who can't act at all?

The GE one about the lady scientist. "Millie Dresselhaus" sounds like a Nazi war criminal.

The two stupid guys that fly to San Francisco to see some band that apparently no one else cares about. As they get out of the cab, late no less, there is no one outside and when the door opens no one inside. But the rumor was true!

I can't stop feeling bad for Poor Jen's dry eyes!

"Victory is OURS, Mister Kitty!" I hate those two little brats in that ad.

The mom raises one eyebrow well though. That's not easy for every actor.

R202, I agree. The Millie commercial is awfully cloying. I STILL think the voiceover sounds like the Panera girl.

Those Whole Foods commercials are copying the Panera girl commercials with their own Panera-girl sounding girl talking about the purity of their food.

[quote]"Millie Dresselhaus" sounds like a Nazi war criminal.

Wait, Millie is not a real woman scientist?

Honestly....how long did it take the Phillips Company to realize 'The Colon Lady' was a bad idea before replacing her with the more attractive 'Phillips Lady'?

The red haired colon lady is for a prescription bowel issue drug. She's not the Phillips lady.

Sorry 212 you did not pay attention - originally those Phillips caplets had an ad with yes - THE COLON LADY! The ad men must have gotten blowback that she was rather gross and they brought in the PHILLIPS LADY. Same product. The Viberzi (sp) lady is the red headed nut who crawled into bed with the lady with bowel issues preventing her from a night of passion because instead she had a night running to the toilet.

Any commercial where a fat diabetic is exercising and smiling and having a great time.

The Johnny Depp SauVAGe commercial! Oy vey! The vag sure found it's douche!

A little off topic but just saw a Swifter commercial that uses Blondie's "One Way or Another". A year or so ago, Blondie put out a CD with new versions of all their songs and I wondered why they would bother. Now I know. They didn't own the old recordings, just the publishing since they wrote them, so they remade them all and now they can sell them. Free and clear of any connections to Chrysalis Records. Listen close and you'll see it's not Debbie's same vocals on that new commercial. Very smart move.

r216 it's Swiffer, why does everyone think it's swifter? And the ad for fibromyalgia where it shows the ladies sadly watching people play sports that they can no longer play...like all that's stopping them from playing soccer is a pain med. Sure....

Not sure of the brand, but there's a dog food commercial with the dog doing a voice-over as he eats the food. "Hey, this has chicken *chomp chomp* and what's this - spinach? *chomp chomp*". I keep waiting for someone to do parody of it. "This new dog food has cow intestines *chomp chomp* and - wait a minute, I have to lick my privates *slurp slurp* hey, did the cat take a dump in the litter box? *munch munch*"

The newest set of ads with faux-Kathy Griffin diarrhea girl are out of control.

The kindergarten teacher and her Mexican vacation on booking.com must be making a fortune in residuals because I see it at least 15 times a day. However my favorite little girl, the one who spells out "BUTT" with pushpins, has gotten cut out of the shorter version, which is all I see now. Advertisers are cheap fuckers.

R220 that one and the cottonelle ones are driving me up a wall. I can't even watch live tv anymore until they are out of circulation.

Might not be a fortune, R220, and yes "cheap fuckers" indeed. Most of the commercials being shot today, including in L.A., are going non-union. Guess they figured out they could pay someone to smile off Craig's List and not pay residuals. SAG-AFTRA is useless.

"I named my car Brad" "I'm supposed to drive 75% of a car?" The french lady that ages 70 years while eating a Dove chocolate. Unsettling.

[quote]The french lady that ages 70 years while eating a Dove chocolate.

That commercial is horrifying. She has to be the most wrinkled person I've ever seen on TV.

I think they cut for time, R222, anything to shave a few seconds off. What I don't get is , if they have already paid for the rights to a song, why do they have to chop it up so badly? Example is the Taylor Dayne Cheeto dad: he sings like one and a half lines, and they cut him off in mid word.

There's actually a hard written rule about how many lines one can sing from a song without having to pay for the rights; Why Andy Cohen tells guests not to sing and cuts them off, says there is no budget for music rights. I wonder if they got away with not having to pay for that Taylor Dayne song altogether. No original artist, just an actor saying a line, might be exempt.

R163 YES, that one stupid, wrong note! Fortunately, I haven't see the Farmer in the Dell ad lately.

But the "real" food-outraged Panera cunt is back, so fucking annoying. May this be the high point of her career.

I didn't think it was possible to dislike aging skeletal hipster Anthony Bore-dain any more than I already do, but his use of that Ramones song makes me want to kick him and the Peloton bitch (they also use that song) in the cuntbone.

Ugh, really, despise the sausage one with the fat hick with cutesy deadpan and the taxidermy animals in the woods. Taxidermy is sad and depressing, not cute. And sausage is horrifying.

The Liquid Plumbr was a WTF thing since the product wasn't introduced until late into the commercial. Gross and annoying too.

I'm hating this stupid commercial where two soccer moms are talking about their protein snacks. One says she has cheese, meat, and nuts. The other one, embarrassed to admit that she only has cheese, grabs a handful of grass, begins eating it, and says "... and these herbs."

"The one in the left" "the crunchy one" they're all crunchy you Dick! I bet there are alot of customers that do that

R230, what are you talking about?

Popeyes chicken. Easy to guess if you live in the South, R231.

"I'll take my chances..." The commercial with the guy going into witness protection who refuses to give up his Audi SUV for a less noticeable Lexus SUV. Uh, sure. THAT makes sense. I hope his smug ass gets blown to bits as he drives away in his Audi.

How about the new insurance one where parents abandon their kids to go motorcycle riding up the coast because their rates are low. That's the kind of customers we want!

Audi makes more coveted cars that Lexus any day of the week.

Audi has made awful commercials lately. The creepy one about Secretariat gets muted every time.

This was a good Audi television commercial a few years back.

I think it was in the Superbowl that year.

Boost mobile, "do i look like a ATM?" No you look like a refrigerator you big tub of lard!

New Ipad pro with a fucking annoying goth chick who hates everything. "Multi task? Multi hate!" Yeah you're really gonna fucking hate it when your parents make you get a job to pay for your own shitty hot topic clothes and black eyeliner. Why is it supposed to be acceptable or funny to market expensive shit to be bought for asshole kids? Fuck, you hate it? Let's give it to some inner city kid, he'll love it.

I actually like the "Roll on, sister" ad campaign with the three black women -- one a chef, one a dancer, one a pilot. But I am curious and I hope this doesn't come across wrong: why would Ford do a campaign THAT specific? I mean, its not even aimed at African-Americans, it's aimed at African-American women. And it plays all the time so they have put some major money into it. Is it normal to target a minority within a minority rather than a mix of people in their ads?

r240 I dunno, why don't we ask the tranny "mother" in the Dove real women ads?

Saw this one the other day. Thought it was an old run. WHY they're re-running it?

A new Aflac commercial which I've seen a couple of times. How potentially offensive is this when the father is injured but all the mother and son are concerned about is not having enough money to go to Hawaii? Another one of those commercials you can't imagine EVER getting out of the draft meetings if the genders were reverse. "Imagine it... mom gets hit in the face! Hilarious, right?"

Did anyone mention the Clear Blue Easy commercial on Hulu? OMG. That one alone has made me consider upgrading to the no-commercial option.

The pharmaceutical industry ads. All of them.

Treat them like tobacco.

The LegalZoom ad called "Woodworker". I abhor the tattooed arms and hands of the star of the commercial. I think it's the juxtaposition of the excessive tattoos with the casual dress shirt and the yuppie eyeglasses. It's like, which are you: a biker/rebel/convict, or a business professional?

I underatand the message to be, "no matter how hip, dangerous, or punk-rock you think you are, you're still going to need legal help starting your business." I just don't know why this particular guy thought all those tattoos looked good. I also don't understand why he's wearing such nice clothes. I have a friend who owns a woodworking studio, and he does NOT dress like that while working.

The guy is pretty handsome, though, despite all that, and I like that there's a shot of him leaning over so that his untucked casual dress shirt lifts up and we see some skin.

And speaking of untucked dress shirts, I am so sick of this guy and his massive jowls and his apparent anger at how long it took for him to figure out how to make a shorter dress shirt.

"Like a lot of guys, I couldn't find a shirt that looked good untucked." Really?

My boyfriend is a stylist and hates, hates, hates this commercial. He thinks the guy and is a complete idiot and his concept is a joke.

The guy's singing voice in this commercial is everything wrong wth contemporary singing.

Why is the Untuckit concept a joke?

We needed to hire and was having a hard time finding the right people. (For a fucking cafe?!)

I was spending all day just looking at resumes. With Zip Recruiter we know we have the right candidates for the job.

R249, read the comments at the YouTube link I provided for the Untuckit commercial. There are many people who do a very good job articulating why that guy and his concept are so widely loathed.

R4 oh shit, PC matic dude looks like Buddy Hackett fucked Bernie Madoff and had a kid, then that child grew up and fucked a pineapple making this PC Matic guy.

The Untuck it guy looks like he's about to have roid rage break down in the dazzling early morning sunlight. I LOVE DL because I thought I was crazy for not liking this guy and his meat mc meaty face. He looks like he just beat the shit out of girlfriend, kissed her, FUCKING UNTUCKED his shirt and did this commercial...just before he roided out and beat a car with his bare fists.

I hate that Dove chocolate commercial. Oh such je nais say TWAT. She throws a dart almost hitting someone and just laughs like some stuck up thoughtless bitch. Oh and the kick in the teeth "Live each day as if its the only one".....WTF?! So live reckless and eat shit garbage chocolate everyday. Cuz that's SO French.

"Oh, I'm not a security guard. I'm a security monitor."

The one that runs on NY-1 all the time with the little girl and her father, where she admonishes him for not wearing a seatbelt after they get into a cab. "Daddy! Daddy!" she shouts, and he looks at her and half smiles, like he's thinking "You annoying bitch." She has a pair of GIGANTIC pigtails that look like elongated clumps of rusty red lint. Not cute, even on a child.

Eating Dove? I thought Dove was soap.

The icky Trivago bum is back, this time with a series of still photos of him 'stealing shampoo' and (urp) eating a humongous breakfast of pancakes and whatnot that is for sure gonna clog up the toilet in his fabulous Trivago-discovered hotel suite. Why do they think this guy is attractive, let alone persuasive. I want to take a wire brush to him. And not in a good way!

I must be old because I can remember when everybody thought the Trivago guy was the hottest thing around.

The actual Untuckit shirts are pretty expensive. I think there's another company that also specializes in similar shirts and, again, fairly expensive. I'm surprised there's not TJ Maax grade knockoffs since I don't think you can patent a shorter length shirt. It's actually a good idea or casual wear, but there's obviously still plenty of situations where you probably need to be tucked.

That fucking commercial for Twitter with the annoying bird whistling.

Basically any commercial which involves someone screaming for any variety of reasons - in other words, every commercial on TV right now.

r255 -- hate that commercial too, but love the facial expression of the bank customer on the floor.

And in the companion spot set in the dental office, the line by the faux dental hygienist, "That's bad!"

Millennial frau "Amber" tells us in vocal fry how "Paxton," one of her "two little boys," suffered from some baby acne when he was a newborn, so she found a solution to his special medical skin condition in the form of All "Free Clear" laundry detergent. She's never going back to any other brand.

The fucking Wayfair ads. The ones where someone orders something and then throws their phone across the room is just stupid. And the other where people dance like they're having a seizure while they talk about what they ordered. They should all be set on fire.

The Partnership for a Drug Free America ads featuring clueless young Baby Boomers / old Gen Xers, who supposedly named their kids "Brad" or "Katie" instead of "Jayden" or "Haley," confiding to their friends about said teen children's drug use, and the hearers of such horrors are speechless.

Really? "Most people" from those generations "don't know what to say about drugs?" Who is the targeted demographic for these ads? I mean with these outdated character names and naivete about drugs?

Drug and alcohol addiction IS a disease. You need help NOW! Call NOW!!!

The Viagra commercials featuring women in their early-mid 30s dressed like high class whores, sauntering around in luxurious vacation condos, waiting for their John to arrive.

Clearly the typical straight male Viagra customer isn't going to use it with his middle-aged wife.

R264, I agree those are hilarious commercials.

Those Wayfair commercials truly are the most nauseating. There are a lot of annoying commercials as evidenced by the tremendous list we've given here in this thread, but Wayfair actually makes me ill. The rooms, the way the people are dressed, the music, the dancing. Just sickening.

My friends can tell what I'm thinking, just by looking in my eyes. But what they didn't know, was that I suffer from chronic dry-eyes! They never knew! Can you imagine that? From the moment I got up, until I went to bed, I was using eye drops, and they didn't know! I have some crappy friends.

Christ, it's July 29 and Office Depot is running "back to school" ads already.

Well, July 29 is VERY close to back to school so why shouldn't they run the ads already?

R190, that may be my least favorite commercial of the decade. FUCK that version of the song.

That green, ugly monster looking thing that does those ads for that bank gets my vote for most hateful commercial. Especially in that latest one where he's harrassing an AA couple who are out together trying to have a nice dinner at a restaurant.

"Daddy's having steak tonight!" Shut up you ugly, annoying muppet wannabe, I hope you get thrown into a boiling pot in the kitchen.

Penfed Credit Union's jingle makes me wanna climb a tower and start shootin'.

"Great rates for Hooterville! Great rates for Marge and Bill!"

A trend in recent adverts is for touchy-feely wishy washy music by singers basically wailing...hate them with a passion

This Serta commercial that reminds me of that annoying baby voiced woman from those awful Panera Bread commercials.

I love it that other people are bothered by Jennifer Anniston's dry, itchy eye commercial.

The ad at r183 plays completely different to me. That isn't grandpa, they are are empty nester's that are becoming foster parents and grandpa is so obviously a closet case and by the looks of his nervous actions I feel like he is also a pedo. That commercial gives me the creeps.

Does anyone know who the actor is in the fairly new KY Yours and Mine commercial? He's not gorgeous But there is still something very sexy about him.

The Veggie Bullet infomercial. Sad enough to see a former "Food Network Star" hocking this shit, but the woman is a near lobotomy case: "I never heard of cauliflower rice!!" "I never heard of spiralizing broccoli stumps!!" (um...has ANYONE?) "Now I can feed my kids lasagna without feeling guilty!!" Then there are her repeated references to "ooey gooey cheese," which somehow make me wanna vomit.

R281 I've never seen this commercial before but doesn't using "ooey gooey cheese" generally negate the healthy benefits of eating vegetables?

You know who I hate more than the two guys in the Sonic commercials? The two women in the DriveTime ads!

The ad for some drink called "bai" that has creepy Chris Walken using the lyrics from NSNYC's song "Bye Bye Bye" to sell the product. Then they show dead-eyed Justin Timberlake is sitting next to Walken. The whole ad is just unsettling - two stone faced dudes selling a funky drink but I guess it works cause I'm a little curious to taste this crap.

I was curious who penned the song, thinking maybe Justin had writer credit and allowed use of the song and also being in it would benefit that way. None of the band members wrote the song; does Justin need money due to his non-existent career? It's a guess on my part that he financed this company hoping to be another 50 Cent, who owns/owned some of Vitaminwater or his career tanked and he gotta do whatever to pay the bills.

"So this happened. Zoe brought over some Lime-a-Ritas to Ava's rooftop, and that's when we knew it was going to be one of THOSE nights. That's Elise bustin' out her dance move from Summer of '08."

I want a tornado to drop down on Ava's rooftop and hurl Ava, Zoe, Elise and the rest of the partygoers to their deaths.

Here's a rant about commercials in general - they are everywhere!

I recently got a Roku and found out that the "channels" on it are plagued with commercials too. I can understand that the major established networks like FX, TNT, etc. would want to get revenue from all outlets, but it was a downer to see ads there. There may be even more ads on the Roku than on regular TV. I've added some random channels not affiliated with network TV (ex. tubitv) and even they subject viewers to 1-5 ads before the movie/show starts. Yeesh.

I hate all of those Chevy "real people, not actors" commercials. Here's a good parody of one of them.

Saw a fucking chewy.com ad that infuriated me today. The chick said that she was a busy stay at home mom to 2 boys and as such didn't have time to go buy pet food. Are you fucking kidding me? Spin it how you want but you're a housewife and don't have time to buy dog food? Yeah, shopping at real stores is for those lazy women with full time jobs, you have to pack lunches and drive to soccer games.

[quote] The walking, talking intestine of Viberzi, a prescription irritable bowel drug. Red haired woman in a flesh colored bodysuit (intestines) hounding another woman, following her around and contorting herself.

Are we sure the Viberzi intestine woman isn't Kathy Griffin?

R277 the Panera chick actually is a teenage girl, not a baby-voiced woman. Yes, she does suck, but she's not an adult. She might be 15 now. Zoe Wiesner is her name.

It's not fried it's Shake and Bake and I helped!

This is regional, specific to New England/Northeast - gross, ugly, obnoxious Michael Rappaport's Cumberland Farms coffee ads. Shut the fuck up with your gross Noo Yawk accent.

[quote]The ad for some drink called "bai" that has creepy Chris Walken using the lyrics from NSNYC's song "Bye Bye Bye" to sell the product. Then they show dead-eyed Justin Timberlake is sitting next to Walken. The whole ad is just unsettling - two stone faced dudes selling a funky drink but I guess it works cause I'm a little curious to taste this crap.

It's supposed to be cool but it's not. Timberlake wouldn't be caught dead with his fellow band members ever again but he'll use the music in a commercial cause it's Walken. Lame

R289, the Viberzi woman (who actually has a name, "Iritabelle,") is played by actress Ilana Becker.

r294 That chick played a crazy fan on DL fave Beverly "Plymouth Valiant" Mitchell's new show with Jodie Sweetin. It's actually a good show!

There's a new annoying, baby-voiced singer in town. You KNOW she cradles her mug of Folgers.

Holy shit that's annoying!

Thank you, R294. Good to be able to put a name to the face that I hate.

WalletHub. Some new credit score app.

Hate the inexplicable purple backlighting in this commercial. Hate the "spoiled milk" theme (is it or isn't it spoiled milk? It's unclear).

LOVE the hunk. Can't find his name anywhere.

I'm sure she's lovely, but I'm sick of Asha Ida Bell.

R299, his name is Laif Gilbertson.

Thank you, R301!! How in the hell did you find that out?

Aldi frau trying to break the news to her deadbeat of a husband that she's pregnant.

"I like ice cream...and pickles...did you hear me, fucktard?"

GAHHHHHHH! That baby-voiced Folger's commercial at -r296-. I'm gonna shove chopsticks in my ears!!! Horrifying.

Whatever happened to Mrs. Olson? Cora? Josephine the Plumber? Mr. Whipple?

Not to get off track but two I LOVE of late: those new Magnum ice cream commercials with the women and the wild animals walking in front of them. A great eye-catching image, even if Lana did it in one of her videos first. AND it made me want to buy the ice cream too. Give that guy a Commercial Oscar (an Addie?)

And, on a more lustful note, the kid with his young wife/girlfriend who says "See? You GOTTA go to Ross" is adorable. Make him a star. Can the one who tracked down the actor's name above help out here?

[quote] R3: Safelite repair, Safelite replace. Just maddening.

I have this suspicion that it's the company owner's kids singing. They seem to be getting older. Still off key, though. Somebody must think it cute but I hate it, too.

The Charmin Bears Reign of Terror is getting worse. Now the whole family is erotically rubbing the toilet paper as 'sexy' music plays.

Wtf bears dont use toilet paper

The Kiester lady must be put to death immediately in a pop-up grease fire. Thank you.

The Chase commercial with the guy who's struggling with the dough for a noodle recipe that's written on ancient parchment. His mother shows him how to knead a ball of dough and seconds later he's tossing hand-pulled noodles around.

I HATE that fucking twee acoustic song in that commercial, R311! So sick of that type of music being foisted on us.

Febreeze - the guy uses the guest bathroom "because sometimes you stink" and sprays after and stays there smelling it.

Some new dating site for older rich guys I guess? Elite singles I want to say. This dude is so skeevy looking he makes Trivago dude look wholesome and apple cheeked... and this is elite?

I would like to know how much the CDC spends on airtime for those gruesome 1-800-QUIT-NOW ads. I only watch TV for 1-2 hours a night, yet see those commercials 3 or 4 times.

The female Trivago commercial! She is dull as dishwater with an irritating accent. Give me the over-exposed, cute, middle-aged Trivago guy anyday!!

Now the unwatchable Trivago guy has an ad where he plays multiple characters. As if he's a cast member of SNL and he has this great unhidden talent. Ughh he's so fucking smug.

I went to iSpot to see what the Elite Singles guy looks like and now I'm wondering which one of you had already been there honing your EST skills...

[quote]This guy looks like the one that veered into my friends car almost hitting us in Appleton, Wi. My window was down and I shouted at him. When we got along side traffic was stopped he put his window down and asked what my problem was fatso. He also challenged me to get out of the car and take him on. I'm female, disabled, yes overweight, but if there would have been more than a foot between the vehicles I would have taken the smirking ass bastard on. I had my cane, a purse that weighs 5 lbs and I just came from the library with a full bag of books. I was packing. I could have just threw my drink in his face but I was thirsty and my phone was in my other hand. My bff was making her comments. His excuse for swerving was didn't you see the car pulling out? Um no, that's on your right you should have stopped and let the person pull out, not swerve into the other lane..My bff called him ugly, Mr smirk said he knew he wasn't. Ugly inside YES, maybe not outside.

Annoying overdubbed fake accents...

Ye gods! The Liberty Mutual insurance ad starring Brad's girl is back!

It's worse than that, R320. Panera has a new one starring our favorite SANWHICH indignant millenial.

Like Panera is even healthy. Ever read what's in that broccoli cheese soup? >shudder<

Can we hurry up and kill the brat in her princess outfit who tells her father "You are free to go..."? Before she starts breeding?

The exhausted face of the twee voice of Panera:

Ugh! The Frau-fest lime-raita ads. It's going to be one of thoooose night! Kill them all with fire!

That Elite dude is too much.

The "Dollhouse Part 2" commercial with the female voiceover talking very fast about what everyone is saying with the culmination of "I don't want to do nothing but talk about the Dollhouse Part 2 for the rest of my life". Ugh! Even if I was interested in watching the play, the annoying ass commercial would've turned me off!

I thought the Panera voice was Brad's owner. Guess not. There's two cunts out there with that voice.

The Panera voice is a very young Jewish girl. That is not her in that picture.

The Asian "Brad" girl in the Liberty Mutual commercials sounds exactly like Kellyanne Conway at the beginning of the latest commercial. It weirds me out every time.

Dying to hear her "Lancastershire" accent!

[quote]British (RP, Lancastershire, Cockney), American Southern, New York Bronx, Irish, Scottish, Russian, French

Nutrish. (need I say more)?

This is not the Panera voice, r328?

That damned Toyota ad playing on youtube vids. I wrote Toyota and told them that just on the basis of being spammed with their stupid ads I'd never ever consider buying a Toyota.

No, the Panera girl is Zoe Wiesner. Google her.

How about the DNA test commercial where a woman brags "I'm everything! I'm from every nationality." Right - so she comes from a long line of sluts.

The one for blind people who have non-24 syndrome. Blind people can't really appreciate tv ads and the rest of us have no interest. Closely followed by many other prescription drug ads. The warnings are the worst. [Don't take this if you are allergic to it. Duh...)

Non-24 ads make me sad for few seconds.

The one with the black and white broads riding around saying yes and no, shaking and gyrating in their seats with smiles so ridiculous that they must have long dildoes stuck up their vadges. I don't even know what they're advertising, and I don't want to know. Get these pigs off the air. They're ruining baseball games and Seinfeld reruns.

LOL r337. Are you talking about this DriveTime commercial?

That's the one! The mastertape and all copies need to be dumped in a greasefire.

The Gillette commercial where you could order blades by voice. It shows the other guy using his face to hit the phone and get shaving cream on it. Why did they need to reorder blades right then? Do they get delivered instantly so they can finish their shave right away?

The "Street Easy" commercials that endlessly run on Spotify.

I want to kick the bitch eating baby carrots in the vagina bone.

The woman whose bathroom stinks because she loves to go #2 there. [bold]TMI![/bold]

University of Phoenix Pixar commercial. Impossible to know song

Bitch in a factory gets replaced by robots and goes to University of Phoenix and gets an office job? Yeah right!

I am pretty sick of the animated "When I was in foster care, I always kept my bag packed..." commercial, after seeing it about three million times. She's adopted by an interracial couple who keep setting fires!!

And I hate the anti bullying ad with those giant cyclops emojis walking around.

I get kind of heartsick every time I see "award winning actress Anjelica Huston" reduced to wearing a big dollar sign and hiding behind a curtain in those idiotic Mark Wahlberg ads for AT&T or whatever. Is she that hard up for cash? Couldn't she have just stuck to voiceovers?

r337 that commercial and all drive-time commercials with those two stupid bitches are inane.

The new "PuppyBabyMonkey" commercial for Mountain Dew gives me Island of Dr. Moreau acid-trip nightmares.

The FLAT singing (Let's Stay Together) Samuel L. Jackson - Capital One commercial!

Those Quiznos rays.🐭🐭🐭

I hate those Sonic queers.

The Crest commercial with the blonde that looks like Kelly Ann Conway , deleting her photos because her teeth look yellow. I'd like to knock them out of her mouth.

I know! And they're not even YELLOW but pearly white up front.

The NAPKIN test! Sounds like the 'paper bag' test.

The Swiffer ad with the budding young male hair stylist who is cutting the hair off of his stuffed animals and then goes in for his baby sister when Mom walks into the picture and just smiles, shakes her head and reaches for her Swiffer cleaner. What mother wouldn't be freaking out if she saw one of her kids doing that? But that seems to be a trend in commercials - children doing very mischievous things and the parents ignoring it.

50 years ago a mother would panic if she thought her fucking son was a queer stylist.

That stupid CarMax WBYCEIYDBO commercial. It's not remotely clever and the actor who stars in it is completely irritating, as is the acronym.

These baby voiced Clearasil teen commercials.

The Ring doorbell commercials where the homeowners are total asses to the people they see. "What I need is for you NITWITS to get off my lawn!!!"

I was hoping they would've thrown a rock through her window after she yelled at them like that.

I've just seen a new (to me) one for something called a Pill Pro. The most ridiculous part is when the guy looks frustrated that a pill organizer the size of the one below won't fit in his jacket's inner pocket, which is probably 4" x 6" at best.

That absurd LandRover commercial where the driver picks up his buddies in a sandstorm to the tune of the Blue Danube Waltz, then they go yachting.

The Taltz commercial with its mournful, mewling, pukey male vocalist

This one has probably been mentioned, but for some reason it is still airing despite its nauseous content: the horrible ginger with "Skittles pox" and the retarded looking girl who PICKS ONE OFF HIS FACE AND EATS IT!

AAUUGGHHH!

I can't watch that Skittles commercial. I have to cover the screen with my hands. It literally gives me the heebie jeebies.

r363, that is one of the most repulsive commercials I have ever seen. I will look away or quickly change the channel if that one comes on.

Who in the world ever thought that would be a good commercial to SELL skittles? It makes me not want to ever buy or see them again.

Stupid special k commercial that women are powerful because they eat lol

And any commercial with annoying kids singing /back to school shit.

The IKEA ad with the girl away at college, cleaning up her room before her male study partner comes by. There is a very annoying voice-over of her mother admonishing about having boys in her room/sitting on the bed with the boy. Calm down, 1950's mom!

Seriously, do female ad executives not realize how stupid that Special K commercial makes women look? Like retarded puppies who have to be reminded to "own" eating. Ask them and you know you'll get a long diatribe about eating disorders and all that shit but it's still absolutely laughable: owning eating (but only Special K, the diet staple since I was a boy). In 2017!

The one for the Microsoft laptop with the young, black teacher with his braids arranged into a point on his head. He introduces himself as the "rapping teacher" and is shown dancing in front of his class - that's my second reason to despise his hipster ass. Then he talks about making up rap rhyme schemes and crap on his laptop, to make his lessons click with his young students. Whatever, bruh. You are so phony.

I hate the "Julie' commercial for some kind of breast cancer medicine. She looks smug. Surprising that they don't show her cradling a mug of some hot crap while she goes about her 'new normal'.

Definitely that car commercial (its soo bad i cant remember the brand) with the hipster douche singing that god awful sweet caroline song ugh!! Makes me want to turn the channel.

Two that make me want to shoot out my TV with a gun:

--The one with the creepy looking older guy with the Brylcreem hair who moans, "My sweetheart said Sayonara!" while sniffing a green scarf. Is this supposed to be some kind of '50s takeoff or what?

--And the woman who coos that she loves her couch, despite Gordo the giant dog smearing shitstains all over it, which she (mistakenly) thinks Febreze will correct!

[quote] I had a friend in the 90's who used to do commercial jingles. She did that annoying "bye bye dry, I'm giving Tone a try!" and "feeling like cinnamon toast, feeling like cinnamon toast crunch!" She said they were purposely extremely annoying to stick out and be remembered.

The issue was expertly explained in 1947

What's with the bimbo who buys a girly cake for a baby shower, is surprised to be told that the baby will be a boy, & is able to exchange the cake at the last minute, whew!!? Who orders a sex-specific cake without asking about the baby first? The odds are 50/50, just take a chance?

And what does this have to do with the kind of car she's driving?

[quote]The Ring doorbell commercials where the homeowners are total asses to the people they see. "What I need is for you NITWITS to get off my lawn!!!"

Yes! I hate those smug homeowners. That woman at the salon whom you quoted there, sounds so incredibly cunty and fat-frau-ish.

There's another home security company that had a commercial last year, still airing now, featuring a hot dad in his pajamas slowly walking through the house and turning off the lights, and he makes it to the front window and peers out and confidently says, "Not on my watch."

Those commercials appeal to people's need to see themselves as strong and accomplished and capable of protecting their families and their property. I just don't personally feel that I need such a security system myself. And I live in big bad Brooklyn. The people in those commercials just come off like such smug ASSHOLES.

"I like this cup of coffee and I like this cup of coffee... I like a nice cup of coffee". I hate Aldi ads.

This Old Macgimmick Sanderson Farms commercial.

I don't know what it's advertising, but it's a montage of two newlyweds building a house. One of the clips in the montage is the wife going inside the empty house, but seeing a Happy Birthday balloon in the corner, and starts crying. Imagine being such a mess that you cry over a fucking balloon.

This thread depresses me, since we're only listing the terrible ads and there are hundreds of them in current rotation. Add in the tolerable ones, and we're all drowning in ads. It's pathetic.

Every time I see the commercial for the upcoming movie "Daddy's Home 2", Mel Gibson's evil, grizzled face makes me angry. Plus, he looks so out of place in this so-called comedy.

I cannot STAND that Dove chocolate commercial with Edith Piaf's caterwauling! Auughh!

AND...I hate to say this, but I am pretty sick and tired of seeing all the cancer commercials: "I was diagnosed with small cell nonspecific whatever..." A lot of them are for Cancer Treatment Centers of America, which I assure you is one very crooked outfit. I used to work in corporate insurance; they have a very poor relationship with insurance companies, as they are notorious for padding their bills.

I am very sorry you have cancer, but I don't really want to hear about it, thank you.

THE BITCH WITH ECZEMA WHO THINKS “IT’S FINE!!!!”

The whole thing sounds like it was written by the fraus in the legal dept. Or the bitchy one with the pearls who probably runs HR but wanted to be an actress. Oh, and diversity works better when it's not sooo obviously forced.

The CARVANA cunt who's all reluctant to sign the contract for a new car and keeps saying, "I'm so sorry, but ...." Why do fraus go around apologizing for EVERYTHING? I want to punch that woman in the throat and blow up and 'air-weenie' thing that supposedly saves the day in that ad. Stupid.

The Old Navy with the group of people caterwauling in a driveway. I wish a car would plow into them

The Infinity commercial that’s running now for the holidays with the cunty wife sending the hubby out for all manner of things and he can’t do anything right. He brings an apple pie and she replies “Dad likes pe-KAHN. I seriously want to smack her face.

Holy shit! As I’m typing it, it comes on!

I hate the State Farm ads. OK, the dog water ballet one is clever, but I really despise the one where the moose gets his rack caught in a swing set and comes crashing through some family's RV windshield. Then J. K. Simmons smugly proclaims, "Yep. We covered it!"

What the hell good is that? Why are you bragging about covering bizarre one-in-a-million freak accidents? I want to know how well you'll cover stuff that never happens. I want to know how well you'll cover everyday claims like dented fenders, smoke damage and broken windows.

I don't mind getting surgery because I get a popsicle at the end. Put a little smile in your heart.

R389, obviously those ads have failed since they're for Farmers Insurance, not State Farm.

Can't find it online but there's a really annoying Amazon Alexa commercial playing in Canada right now. Chipmunk-faced bespectacled millennial girl all depressed because winter, sets up this tacky hipster Hawaiian kiki for her and her bestie Tracie, all with the help of Alexa. Set to Steal My Sunshine by Len.

Thanks for the correction, R391. (I'm relieved to hear that it's a Farmers commercial because State Farm is my insurance company.) Also, that second-to-last sentence in my post R389 is missing a word. It should have read, "I DON'T want to know how well you'll cover..."

I despise the couple who gush over how "uh MAAZ ing!" Time Share Exit is. Caucasian husband & Asian wife, coyly referring to how the birth of their "first born child [simper]" changed them from carefree time-sharers in Maui to cozy adults who'd rather "spend time as a family [snuggle]". The husband is hot, but he's been well & truly tamed by a fecund bitch with a little-girl voice.

Anyone wanting to know what vocal fry is should watch the Poshmark commercials. That woman has it cranked up to lethal levels. I don't think I've ever heard worse.

Truly horrendous voice, R395. Who could live with that on a daily basis?

I can't stand the new Shriners commercial with kids progressing verrry slowwwly through mud puddles. I think the idea is that they're competing in a Tough Mudder, but it's just a flat field with a couple of non-electrified mud puddles. They keep going back to a tiny dykeling doing a push-up with her wee 10-inch legs off the ground, as if that's an accomplishment for someone whose entire body is comprised of upper-body.

To add insult to injury, some versions have a voiceover by DL fave Alec at the end and his voice is changing!

r395! My GOD! Who would hire an actress with a voice like THAT to sell anything?

The Liberty Mutual "Brad" commercial. The girl in that commercial looks like her pussy stinks.

If you scroll down to the bottom of R395's link, The Voice of Poshmark commented:

Alicia Alonso · Estate Manager at Private Company

Thanks for your feedback. I'm actually not an actress, just a normal Poshmark user and they asked me to do the commercial for them. Most definitely NOT a Kardashian wannabe. If I ever decide to pursue acting professionaly I would definitely have proper voice training. Thanks!

-R400- Oh, sure. You talk like that because that's the way a spoiled, do-nothing, self-entitled BITCH who's never had anything bad happen to her talks as she happily and stupidly flounces around in her pointless life. I hope the next box that shows up for you is a GREASE FIRE.

R399, agreed. I hate any commercials written in second person. "You called him Brad. You loved Brad" Endlessly irritating.

The VRBO rental commercials are also in that grating second person narrative. Blech.

Haven’t seen it in a while thank God but for Spectrum just the catchphrase at the end: “Satellite tv bad. Spectrum good or Verizon bad. Spectrum good.” What did those cavemen from those insurance commercials come up with that catchphrase? Has to go down as the worst advertisement in history just based on the catchphrase at the end.

r395, it's Baby Voice AND vocal fry.....UGGGGHHHHHH Added bonus: ukulele music in the background

YouTube Josh w/ 21 Pilots keeps coming on sounding like a frat boy, their album Trench and the song In My Blood....lordy.

And some Latino dope named Aleeuh - can't even make out how stupid she sounds.

The constant law firm commercials. A bunch of fucking modern day ambulance chasers.

Those magical second hand smoke commercials where the smoke always manages to find the baby no matter where they put it and more and more so with each commercial. Think the smoke actually asks for directions after taking a potty break in the newest commercial. Let me tell you, if you can see a trail of smoke traveling from the first floor of your apartment to your baby’s room that ain’t cigarette smoke you’re inhaling.

r408 just created that commercial in her mind.

Ever notice how much goddamn WHISTLING is in every other commercial?

Next it will be "second hand smoking is raping your baby!"

This weird Knotts Berry Farm commercial here in SoCal where the Snoopy in costume character talks or barks or whatever. He sounds identical to Donald Duck. I keep thinking “did he swallow Donald and Donald’s trying to get out or is Donald inside the actual Snoopy costume looking to sabotage the commercial to promote the newly remodeled Disneyland?”

That be a good dad commercial where the kid sounds like he is being murdered. It goes on and on and on and on then repeats. Stop it already!

There’s a popular 80s song that I THINK is French in this RAV4 Hybrid Toyota commercial from this year. Not my favorite commercial so I suppose it belongs here. Does anyone remember what the song is? When I first heard “The Modern Age” by the Strokes in 2000 on Rodney Bingenheimer’s show THIS particular song came to mind.

There's a commercial for Humira and it has the quintessential zPC group of people. Asian guy, black guy, and extremely androgynous fem.

This pretentious, preachy commercial about California voiced by Edward James Olmos. It’s kind of like a living will format and I swear he leaves this one person a rock and I thought of this the moment I first heard it....

Honda Hinchcliffe's red and green shoes in the latest Dream Car Garage series. Trés stupide.

Peloton commercials on at every break on every channel.

A new commercial for dental implants includes a woman who says that dentures never would have been possible for her because she's "too active". How is the use of dentures precluded by being "too active"? At what, exactly?

WTF is that Ruckaten commercial about???

[quote]A new commercial for dental implants includes a woman who says that dentures never would have been possible for her because she's "too active". How is the use of dentures precluded by being "too active"? At what, exactly?

I don't have dentures, but I assume they can get loose if an elderly person's jaw and gums shrink? I guess dentures can fly out of one's mouth if you're on a roller coaster?

An aunt lost most of her teeth in her late 30s. Her three pregnancies literally caused her to lose her teeth. I guess young people might need dentures due to illnesses.

This ones mean but I HATE dental related commercials here in the States narrated by a British person 😆 Other than Olmos for Hispanics and Morgan Freeman for African Americans we are obsessed with the Brits and their thick glorious accents narrating our commercials. I get it, very posh, mature, classy, chic, prissy, elegant etc. But dentistry? Not yet! No thank you. Gordon Ramsey may have changed the way we view British cuisine but there’s still a way to go for certain other fields like dental hygiene and I’m one to talk cause my teeth are quite treacherous and I love British culture but you have to draw the line somewhere.

That one commercial made me laugh so hard my damned ok teeth fell out!

The Portal commercials with NPH and all the moms are moronic.

Bump. Does it seem like the same commercials run for years? Seems like forever and EVER.

Wondering this as the "bad-a-book, bad-a-BOOM" one plays in the background for the millionth time.

I hate those beach resort ones, where they sing "yeah we're all about a good time" or "I had the time of my life -- do do it, do it all again yeah"

Are the residual checks good?

Walmart's "Last name is dom" is DUMB!

R416, the "rock" in the Calif commercial is El Capitain (or similar towering natural monument) and the guy he leaves it to is a mountain climber.

Well even the Rock doesn’t want to smell the bs they’re cooking over in Cali. Still beats that stupid lottery commercial where they play a slowed down version of California Dreamin’ by the Mommas and the Papas. Speaking of the Rock I THINK they played a different version of California Dreamin’ in his disaster of a disaster movie San Andreas. But it was the same damn annoying concept as the lottery commercial and so many other commercials for that matter....slowed down. Hell I’d rather see a reunion of that terrible Saved by the Bell knockoff “band” California Dreams, than hear another atrocious slowed down rendition of the same damn song (they are actually are getting back together btw) And enough with the slowing down of classic rock and pop songs. I heard the most ridiculous, pretentious indie pop version of Survivor by Destiny’s Child on some video game of all places. And I USED TO be the biggest supporter of indie or college or alternative....whatever term they’re trying to come up with these days. It was very wannabe Kate Bushy or Björky eccentric sounding which combined with the balladry of a pop classic is just the absolute worst kind of trend that’s been done to death.

Again, that Daisy cottage cheese commercial. "todays the daisy for cottage cheese"

The mom sitting outside her depressed teenage daughter's room and sliding a chocolate bar under the door to lure the fat bitch out of isolation.

The new Mothers Day Olive Garden commercial is as cheesy as one of their appetizers 😝 equip with that hipstery, indie, folksy, raspy voiced, female led singer songwriter type music you hear in all these commercials lately. At least it’s not a slowed down ballad of a classic from back in the day so I guess it could always be worse.

Those hippie guitar playing Verizon commercials

Isn't there a thread for favorite commercials? I can't even find the search function anymore (not that it worked). I want to post a link to a REALLY GOOD commercial, dammit!

The emciated girl texting about having an addiction to opioids

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